Much of what has been written about Daniel Dubie (George Patrick Dubie, etc.) is about the deceptions he engineered and the trauma those of us caught in his net suffered.
Still the TRUTH is that the guy does not win if we are comitted to healing beyond recovering the basic ablity to survive to turn this experience around and in the end gain a new capacity to thrive.
I believe that in that regard we who experienced this trauma can greatly help one another. I think there is also a large body of helpful resources and literature out there that we can share and benefit from.
Namaste has kindly shared various excerpts that redirect and allow reflection and healing.
I will add to this page healing links that I have appreciated and invite others to add their favorites.
-Hawaiianeyes
My personal rant–
I have been told I have PTSD and Stockholm Syndrome. The PTSD part I think I understand but the Stockholm Syndrome does not make sense to me.
What is this? I feel that I was somehow brain washed. I want to be free of it.
I heard this song today-
Said I loved You … But I Lied – Michael Bolton
The video is filled of Daniels favorite images of horses running in the water. There is a sense of love, images of passion but it nauseates me because it smacks of a manipulative formula I think he used again and again to mesmerize, intoxicate and ultimately subjugate good women into his world of lies.
Getting this type of love from a core group of women that he kept isolated from each other seems to be his whole obsession–but it was a lie. Worse yet he seemed to have used that energy to fuel real dark and criminal pursuits.
I see various sites on the web discussing the horrors of con men/con women. I have seen sites that describe mind control con artists. And other sites that describe all the “sexpat” garbage that Thailand attracts.
Taken all together I find it horrifyingly revolting that I should have fallen victim to this nexus of criminal predatory skill.
I seek recovery from all this.
What nauseatesme the most is how people just keeps on talking about 2 monsters that knowingly did all of the hurtfull things to all the innocent people and never once stop to think about it.Now that they are where they are i’d like to know what will happen to all the 17 children and the many others????? not mentioned, who will take care of them???? What a wasted life….how do we know this just not some kind of a set up? Maybe making a movie out of all of this is their final con….lowlifes!
Dearest Hawaiian Eyes, I’m so sad I didn’t see this entry earlier.
I also have PTSD and as far as stockholm syndrome goes It wouldn’t surprise me.
Here’s the thing, when we (as human beings) are tortured at the hands of those we either love, or depend on for life, and are completely isolated from out side influences – this very strange phenomena occurs. Psychologists call it the Stockholm Syndrome in reference to a hostage situation in Stockholm Sweden. read about it here: http://ask.yahoo.com/20030324.html
Quote:
The behavior is considered a common survival strategy for victims of interpersonal abuse, and has been observed in battered spouses, abused children, prisoners of war, and concentration camp survivors.
End quote.
As I understand it, we (as human beings) become bonded to our tormentors. We have a difficult time separating the lies they told us to keep us under their thumbs from the reality of their selfish predatory ways. They not only become our tormentors they also become our everything. Feed us, clothe us, keep us warm at night (if lucky) , all our emotional needs are either filled by or ignored by, our tormentor. We become dependent and when that happens we lie to ourselves (called slipping into denial) and tell ourselves if we only worked harder, listened better, reacted faster – we wouldn’t be exposed to so much abuse (emotional, physical, psychological or sexual) In essence we take the blame onto ourselves and make delusional justifications on behalf of our abuser’s.
In some extreme cases, we love our abusers. So much so, it can stop us in our tracks towards healing.
Dearest Hawaiian Eyes, what you are experiencing at this moment in time hurts, it hurts to heal, it hurts to deal but it gets better as you get stronger. And my dear, you are already extremely strong.
Much affection to you,
Hazel.